Are You Missing Out on the Benefits of Being Old?

Trying to act young only makes people think you are, and what good is that?

I’d hate for you to miss out on the perks that come with being old. You realize we still have the custom here where old folks get some help.

But are you doing all you can to let people know you’re old? Let’s check.

• How many times in the last 10 days have you heard, “Let me get that for you”? If fewer than 2, you need my advice.

• If you get to the phone on the second ring, you’re too fast. Why rush?

• When was the last time you had to call the doctor’s office to check on your next appointment? That’s not often enough.

• High tech devices? No one expects you to figure them out so why bother.

It’s your time now. All of it!

I remember reading (I think) that when women in burkas get to be 65, they can throw them off and walk down the street in regular clothes, no face covering (except now with COVID). They can look at, go where, and say what they want, with no supervision.

This is a good rule for women everywhere. The reason is that if you wait too long after age 65 it will be too late to walk down the street. So stride, and no hugging the edge of the sidewalk.

But you might already enjoy going really slow, and this works for men too. Going slow, maybe with a walking stick, winnows out the people who don’t really want to be with you. That’s a perk.

Speaking of reducing people’s demands on your time, try what Sam just now said to me when I told him I’m writing this post. He leaned forward and said a little too loudly, “Did you say MILK?” Now I won’t bother him with it.

So if you’re at the age where nobody notices if you do or don’t do what you want to, I say do it. If somebody objects, try a faraway look in your eyes with maybe your hand on your heart and slightly raised eyebrows. You can add a slight intake of breath. Practice in front of a mirror. A warning, don’t fall for what you see there.

One final tip. If it’s 3:45 and they say, “Remember, we agreed to meet at 3:00?”, just look at them and say, “What?”

Photo by Deda Edney